Also, I watched The Expendables last night. I was persuaded by the all-star cast and the promise of exploding things.

Yes, things certainly exploded.

Apart from that, it was a sexist, racist piece of crap. Cringe-worthy dialogue, plot desolation, and acting that made me cry. In the bad way.

There were maybe two good fight scenes. Seriously. Jet Li was hideously underused and, really, don’t get me started on the use of female characters, who seem to exist so that men can hit them.

IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY!

Contrast: the trailer for ‘Red’.

Dude, that’s Helen Mirren with a machine gun! And Mary Lou Parker, who I’ve loved from The West Wing and Angels in America, finally getting her dues. Not to mention the rest of that crazy star-studded cast – with the guns and the explosions and the hand-to-hand (poor smashed Karl Urban).

That’s totally DOING IT RIGHT. Take note, Stallone.

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